Kids won't do chores? Then try this

I was jostled out of my sleep Sunday morning by my 8-year-old. He came barreling into my room, a rag in one hand, Windex in another.

He pointed to a blazing pink Post-It note he’d tacked onto the back of my bedroom door.

“I will be cleaning the house,” it read. “I love you Mom.”

He went straight into my bathroom and went to town on the mirrors. An unsolicited cleaning session AND declaration of love?

Something’s not right.

Perhaps he wants something. Or broke something. Could he be plotting to suffocate me with a glass-cleaner-soaked cloth? Or is this is his way of distracting me before pelting me to death with Legos?

This is the beginning of what’s sure to end in an episode of “Dateline,” I thought to myself under my covers. Oooh, I hope Keith Morrison gets to host that episode. His curiously sinister voice would be perfect.

Am I crazy to let my kid fly alone?

But no. The boy's not plotting my demise. He was angling for poker chips.

I swear I’m not training the kid for a tournament in Vegas. It’s a method his doctors recently shared with me.

Want your kids to do their chores and fulfill other kid responsibilities? You can, through logical consequence – not punishment. It’s based on the concept of "token economy." According to a teacher’s study guide and tips via the Vanderbilt Kennedy Center in Nashville, the concept is “based on the principles of applied behavior analysis (ABA) and emphasize the use of positive reinforcement to target behavior change. Token economies help students to visualize progress, accept and work for delayed reinforcement, learn to self-monitor, and learn to regulate behavior.”

How my son’s doctor explained it was like this:

• Only ask twice for something to be completed;
• Keep with “Grandma’s Rule” of first comes work, then play; 
• Be consistent 99.9 percent of the time.
• Don’t argue back with your kids. It gets you nowhere and leaves you feeling exasperated.

Here’s how you implement it:

Start with a supply of poker chips and a see-through container such as a glass jar. Good behaviors glean reward chips. If my son does what’s been asked of him by the second request, he earns a chip. So does brushing teeth, getting dressed on time, putting his school backpack in its designated spot and various requests. Other actions – such as getting to bed on time, putting toys away and getting along with his sibling – would garner three chips. (Yeah, that last one still hasn’t happened yet. Maybe when he’s 30.)

He’d get about 14 chips on a pretty good day. Then, he cashes in chips for basic privileges: 30 minutes of TV or 20 minutes of electronics would cost four chips, for example. A single Pokemon card or an ice cream treat would run five chips. Bigger treats – such as a trip to the movies or the beach – would cost more; 35 chips would be about right, I was told.

The key is this: you reward your child for good behavior. And you can’t take chips away as punishment. Plus, he sees his stash of plastic coins accumulating. Motivation at its finest.

We’re only about a month in, but already I’ve seen changes such as getting a jump start on chores so he can score those rewards. And the sooner he’s done, the sooner he can play with his next-door buddy, Alex.

Let's resolve to do 2016 right -- realistically

Actually, Alex showed up mid-chores on Sunday and my son roped him into helping out. Cha-ching!!! I had two boys washing dishes while my teenage daughter was still facedown in the pillow.

Every. Mother’s. Dream.

I still get a healthy dose of crabbin' about some of the house rules. But you gotta start somewhere.

Here’s hopin’ this too-good-to-be-true trend continues. And maybe I’ll have an in-house pool and lawn service before long.

Contact Paulson at 321-242-3783 or spaulson@floridatoday.com.